Signs of cheating - false positives - part 1
Recently, I’ve read some topics on other similar blogs with mine, about cheating in love. Easy to notice that the majority of them are mentioning somehow about the recognizable signs of cheating, the symptoms of those who cheat their partner.
Some of these articles are really good and seem to be helpful for the desperate people seeking for advice. However, a lot of them are also seeding panic in their hearts and mind. Generally, the cheated ones (if there is a cheating case) become paranoiac about almost everything their partners do or say.
For example, one of the top symptoms is related to the mobile phone usage - the cheater is strangely answering some phone calls; or, the cheater is not even answering some calls, or messages are received at an “unusual” time, generally at night or late in the evening. Being a cheater once, I can admit these were things that happened to me too and I was doing a pretty good job on hiding them from my lover.
However, there were a lot of moments when I behaved pretty much like a cheater (see the behavior above) without being a cheater. At that time, I was doing that on purpose, just to raise interest of my partner, to make her jealous or to spread some mystery around me. And this is what I call a “false positive”.
The bad thing with a false positive is when you are in the victim’s position - it makes you look week if you react to such “false positives”. It can destroy your relationship, it can affect trust and love you have from your partner.
Some of the usual cheating signs can really be “false positives”.
For example:
- he is coming back from work quite late - he is not necessarily seeing someone else; he is simply working harder;
- she receives messages from her boss at late hours in the evening - her boss might have really forgotten to communicate some urgent task for the next day; it does not necessarily mean that she is dating the boss
Of course, on the other hand, if these are real signs of cheating and you do nothing about it (check this at least once), you are in danger to become ridiculosly stupid.
So, I’m not saying that these signs are not real, but they should not distroy your life. A soon as you suspect someone of cheating you, you will start having the feeling that everything that person does is somehow hidden from you or related to someone else that you would really like to.. “meet”
